MARRIAGE ISSUES; Polyandry and Polygamy Threatening Monogamy

Marriage is a beautiful thing like they say. People envisage spending time with another person for difference reason ranging from companionship, security, finance and religious reasons. But it has always been a debate from different people if getting married to more than one partner is right. Well different strokes for different folks. There are various forms of marriage, but let us put it into three:


Monogamy: This is a marriage institution in which there is only one man and woman involved. This is the commonest type of marriage practiced in the western countries and among Christians’ alike

Polygamy: In this type of marriage, a man marries more than one wife. This type of marriage is pertinent in Arab countries and Islamic cultures alike, although Christians also indulge in this type of marriage.

Polyandry: This a marriage agreement in which a woman is involved with several partners. This type of marriage is frowned upon in western countries and African societies alike. It is even a taboo in African certain African countries. But we have societies like Tibet and Indian in which this type of marriage is prominent.

Now let’s get to the crux of the matter. Marriage is supposed to be the union between two souls, two entities, why do individual now feel like getting another partners?

Reason for Poly Marriage

  1. Religious reasons: This is the most important reason why a man wants to get married to more than one wife. This can be seen in Islamic cultures in which the Quran allows the followers to marry up to four wives if they can take good care of them all. This is like free license given to men; therefore lots of men indulge in polygamy because they are allowed in their religion to do so
  2. Infertility: A good number of men have sworn with their lives never to have more than one wife. But then after waiting for several years without their wife taking to bed, they are pushed to the wall (whatever that means) to get another wife, so that they can procreate. Who says it is the wife’s fault that she can’t give birth? Is she God? Personally I think this is unfair to women, but then what’s my own in other people’s privacy?
  3. Cultural reasons: In certain societies, it is wrong for certain individuals to have one wife. A good example of such societies is the kingship in most Yoruba societies; it is unwise for a Yoruba king to have one wife. This is because the tradition believes the king needs a lot of help around the palace and it may overwhelm one wife.

Having highlighted certain reasons why men may go into polygamy, we have to know that having more than one wife, comes with its problems, like a friend of mine say; one woman, one problem, more women, more problem, I tend to agree with him. Let me tell you why:

Polygamous Marriage Issues

A polygamous marriage breeds unhealthy rivalry and jealousy among wives and children. This is because they are all contesting for the favor of the father and they want to outdo the other children and wives. It is quite sad when we hear stories about how stepsons and daughter are been treated in the absence of their mothers. We also hear stories how one wife is seeking for the downfall of another’s wife children because that one seems to be doing better than her own children. Please men should avoid creating problems for themselves.

Also polygamy put unnecessary strain on one’s finance. It this dire times in which everyone is trying to get the best for his family according to what he can afford, polygamy is not the way. A man can be hindered in providing the best for his family, if he does not have enough money, not to talk of when he now has more than one wife that means more mouth to feed, more kids to put to school and more shelter to provide. Or what shall it profit a man to marry more wives and give birth to  many children but cannot take adequate care of them?

Polygamy is also not a modern type of marriage, Its archaic and obsolete in nature. Most people are been wise in trying to live a simple life and getting the best in Life. Life cannot be simple with polygamy, It is one problem to another, Civilization has come to stay let us embrace it.

Your Marriage Plan

Finally am not trying to condemn men who already have two or more wives but am just letting those who have it in mind to delve into polygamy to have a second thought. Life will be more simple and enjoyable if one can have one wife and be faithful to her. It creates respect and there is less suspicion in such union. More money to go round peace of mind, I want to sound like Joshua in the Bible now, as for me and my family; we are for Monogamy, what about you?


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